You know what they say, the best laid plans of mice and men or whatever. If you’ve been following me you know that last year around this time I had grand plans of quitting my job as a middle school ELA teacher. I was going to be an author and do all these amazing things over summer break. Spoiler alert: I didn’t do any of it.

Many things happened that led me to this place, but let’s just say I spent the summer broke and rotting in bed. I had a lot of dead-end interviews, was offered every job I applied for, and turned all of them down. The vibes were wrong. I wanted an upgrade, not a downgrade so I thought I could afford being picky. At the end of the summer with no job to show for my somewhat minimal efforts and bills looming, I swallowed my pride and crawled back to my old district. I asked them to hire me as an elementary school librarian. To my surprise, they did! It was still teaching, but it was also the library which felt like an upgrade.

I was over the moon and very thankful that the universe chose to bless me with this opportunity. I was not library certified. So I did what anyone would do and I applied for grad school and started my program. Long story short, it didn’t work out. I was unhappy in the position, hated my new principal, and faced some health problems that led to me returning to my old position. I kicked ass in grad school though and I still plan to finish the program.

Even though things didn’t work out as a librarian, I still consider my little adventure a success and I still plan to quit my job, just not so hastily. Eventually, I will quit my job. I’m serious, I’m going to quit my job again. I’m manifesting it again as we speak. I’m not the same woman who was content just bed rotting. No, I am now a woman of action,,, who occasionally rots in bed. The key to bed rotting is moderation. I’m pretty sure Plato said that.

Anyway, back to the plot. Remember those health problems I alluded to? Well it turns out Vitamin D and iron are crucial to human survival. Who would have thought? Not only are they important, but a lack of vitamin D can cause severe muscle weakness, insomnia, and subsequent psychosis. Yeah, get out in the sun sometimes. Your muscles and mental health will thank you.

As sucky as it was to lose touch with reality, it also taught me that I had given up on myself. I realized that I was really unhappy with my life and as I was bed bound, not sleeping and lamenting my situation, I couldn’t blame anyone for unhappiness except for myself. So I did what anyone would do and I focused on my health. Then when my sleep, strength, and sanity returned, I started looking at myself. Psychosis really changes a person.

I started compiling my poetry and addressing my flaws. I still have big dreams (I haven’t given up on quitting my job) but now my work ethic matches my delusions and dare I say my dreams have grown?

So if you’re still interested in what I do next I thank you for your patience and I don’t intend to let you down again. I’m quitting this job, I promise.

With Love,

Velma